A strong marriage is one which both partners have worked on. If effort is not made to communicate, reconnect, and support each other, a marriage can quickly fall apart. That is why it is important to continually evaluate your relationship and how you are treating your spouse.
By putting all of your effort into keeping your marriage intact, you can prevent numerous expenses that affect both your wallet and your emotional state. Here are seven things that you can do to transform your marriage.
1) Work on yourself. While the issues are shared, the only person that you can change is yourself. Take the time to work on your own issues and your spouse may respond to you in a whole different way. Work on your own communication skills, listening skills, and try to make yourself stronger and ultimately a better partner.
2) Know what the issues are. If the two of you have issues, accept them and try to work through them. No one is perfect and it is important that you remember that in your journey to make your marriage better. If you know what the problem is, you can better try to find a solution.
3) Meet the needs of your spouse. Ask them what they expect of you. If their needs are ones you can meet, with a little extra work or effort, then try to meet them. If they are unrealistic, take the time to talk about them, so that you can both come to a better understand of what you each need from your marriage relationship.
4) Make communication positive. Say “thank you”, “I love you”, and “good-bye”. Not talking at all can only make the situation even more untenable. Positively communicating with your spouse with both words and touch can help the two of you to come together and help to make your marriage better. Hold hands, hug, and make love. Those are all things that can help both of you to feel more committed to the relationship.
5) Focus on solutions. It can be easier to just throw blame around rather than finding solutions to your issues, but this can be the wrong move. Put your energy into taking care of your problems and you will be able to find ways to make it through them. If the two of you cannot come to a solution, consider getting professional help to give you some clarity.
6) Make your spouse’s day to day life better. Bring them lunch at work, buy them a small gift, or offer to pick up the kids for them. Anything that can make your spouse’s life easier and better can bring the two of you closer together. Use your imagination to think of things that you can do for your spouse.
7) Give them some of your time. When you want to strengthen your marriage, you have to show your spouse that they are a priority. Give them a special night out, plan a dinner at home, or put the kids to bed early and snuggle up on the couch. Your time is worth more than any gift that you can give, and it will be much more appreciated in the long run.
Marriage is hard work and anyone that does not agree is sure to have issues in their marriage sooner or later. That is why you want to be sure that you are committed to the marriage and to making it work. By giving them your best effort and your time, you can better increase the chance that you will not become disconnected.
Most people do not go into marriage planning to divorce, but it is a fact that approximately half of all first time marriages end in divorce. At least two people are left emotionally devastated and this does not include the financial cost. Financially, it can be a very difficult time full of court costs and lawyer fees at the time of the divorce and can include other costs down the road if you have to learn how to terminate spousal support, fight for custody, or make other changes in your divorce decree.
Divorce may be common, but it doesn’t have to be in your future.
About the Author: Freelance writer, Janis Rodgers, attributes her 15 years of marriage to lots of hard work and humor. When she learned that a friend was looking on www.cadivorce.com for a lawyer, she knew that she needed to share some of her experience in making a marriage stronger. Her articles are full of real life information couples can really use.