The emotional effects of divorce

Divorce, unfortunately, is a fact of life that nearly 50 percent of all marriages have to face – the repurcussion extend far futher than that however. Divorce affects not only the couple involved but also their children, parents, extended families and friends. A divorce is hard on everyone involved, especially the children. The process of getting divorced is invasive, painful and in some cases can even be life ruining.

Emotional Pain of Divorce

One of the things that makes a divorce hard is the emotional pain associated with it. Emotional pain is generally experienced by both parties. Both people feel as if they are losing something, whether it is a person that they love or an institution that they felt deeply about. Regardless of what the loss is, a loss is experienced.

Going through such a change will result in a grief process – no one will be immune, it is part of being human and experiencing loss. When the energy that binds a family together get broken, it takes time to reorganize. While this happens, chaos occurs for all members of the family, whether they like it or not.

Feelings of loss lead people to act differently than they normally would. Some people translate their feelings of loss into acts of anger or revenge, while others translate their feelings of loss in to acts of seclusion and self destructive behavior. These abnormal behaviors make dealing with matters of a divorce difficult to do and they often complicate the legal aspects of getting a divorce.

Money Issues and Divorce

Money is another issue that complicates a divorce. When you are married all of your assets are pooled together, as are all of your expenses. When you get divorced not only are your assets divided in two, but your expenses double. This creates a very scary scenario that many people react to by panicking.

When people panic over money issues during their divorce they take steps to protect their financial security. This means that they may hide assets, they may fight to get more of the marital assets than their fair share or they may bargain for assets that they feel have more value then other assets. Money issues complicate divorces further when they involve child support and alimony.

When Children Are Involved

The issue that complicates a divorce the most is having children. Children complicate the emotional and the money issues that the parents have to deal with, however, they can also provide the grounds to make a divorce a more civil experience.

Parents who want what is best for their kids can agree to put their differences aside to come to a divorce settlement that will allow them both to remain an active part of their children’s lives and to provide for their financial needs.

For more information and support visit the Children and Divorce Facebook page

Main image: iStockphoto

Kathryn Rossiter

Kathryn is a South African lifestyle blogger and mom of 2 who has been blogging daily for over 9 years! She writes about travel, health, beauty, fashion, decor and family... but not food (unless it's food she's eaten made by someone else) as she is a hopeless cook. She only wakes up early for 2 things... a red-eye flight to somewhere exotic and early morning game drives. She has just finished an extensive home renovation and would prefer to never see another box again. She's never met a chocolate or glass of bubbles that she didn't like!

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